When I saw an attractive woman with wide hips and big butt, I fled as quickly as possible because I'm doing my best to avoid having lustful thoughts. I also have god with me all the time because the god will help me to avoid having lustful thoughts and also relapsing. I also don't want any demons in my sleep. The god says, I did it and I should be proud of myself.
I saw an attractive woman with wide hips and big butt
- Thread starter pump20
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Numez
Guest
God is right. I can confirm ;D You did right. If you are not in contact with her, just looking at butts is not helpful at all. Its very counterproductive because it can lead to relapse which is the worst case scenario when you are rebooting.
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Numez
Guest
What is demonic? Looking at female's body parts? I dont know about demons but just looking at it could create thoughts and pictures that are not in align with your recovery goals. I know people believe if its real its okay but when you look at pictures or videos brain still thinks its real so its not a huge difference, unless you are actually with the girl and not just in your head. Its such a big difference because you risk rejection, everything is not under your control, its not all about you, its not easily available, you need confidence, there is touch involved etc.
doneatlast
Well-Known Member
pump20 said:
Well, let's back up a bit.
For those who are atheistically or agnostically trying to quit porn and reboot, considering something "demonic" can be helpful, because sometimes porn addiction seems almost sentient, like it is trying to trick you, and can be at times relentless. It is a simple matter of personification.
For the theists who subscribe to the "spiritual warfare" aspects of faith, it becomes more literal. Porn, demonic or not, wants you down in the dumps, hooked, and never getting anywhere near real sexuality.
Both aspects when applied right look similar, and they also look similar if applied incorrectly.
A WRONG way to think of it is to think of this woman (or her body parts) as demonic. She's a human being. Her body is (presumably) as it was created by her DNA and environment. Small alterations of diet, exercise and clothes not withstanding, it is not some aggressive force out to get you. On another board there is a guy who posts obsessively and is convinced every woman he meets is trying to "steal his semen" and seduce him. He clearly isn't getting it. Women are beautiful, and thinking so isn't a bad thing, even if an example of such strikes us suddenly. Our goal isn't to become asexual. Porn made us asexual... we want to reclaim it and be MORE sexual than before, albeit in a more authentic way that isn't well recognized by a pornified culture.
What CAN be considered demonic, either symbolically or literally, is the porn addiction itself, and the patterns of porn usage. The "demon" in this case is the one that lets you see this woman, and immediately cascade into the mental patterns of porn use, where you're suddenly drawn to look at pictures and play with yourself. This response isn't a response to beauty, but is a need to follow through on certain behavioral patterns, in this case porn and masturbation. The "demon" may also remove the body parts/attributes from the person. I always think of the disembodied breast from Woody Allen's "Everything You Wanted to Know About Sex (But Were Too Afraid to Ask)" that chases them through central park. We aren't supposed to be aroused by fetishized parts, but the whole person. Porn/the demonic deconstruct sex into weird segments, and it never has the same wholeness.
I'm guessing hips/butts is a sticking point for you, so it might be a good exercise to take a deep breath and remind yourself that it is a human being, a woman, with a butt you find attractive, and not a hot butt with a person attached to its front. Maybe she likes how she looks, maybe she doesn't. Maybe she likes the attention, maybe she doesn't. In any case, it is just the cards she's dealt (presumably). It sounds silly, but it can work quite well.
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Numez
Guest
Well said