How Do You Walk Up River? - small steps

mauseie

Member
Hello,

      I am a 23 year old male who has been struggling with porn addiction for approximately 6 years (depending on your definitions). I am a university student and work part time on the weekends. Porn is the reason I cannot move on from past romantic relationships due to shame, regret, and overall sexual performance. I experience PIED when engaging with a sexual partner (which is rare). I have very little confidence and constantly feel like I am missing out on life. The relationships that I have had over the years have been marred with impotence resulting in my defence mechanisms engaging and thus creating emotional distance. Therefor, my inability to become comfortably intimate with a partner impedes me from moving on from old love wounds. I am sure I do not need to convince you that these factors are heavily influenced by porn. Although I have known about this website for years this is the first time posting. I plan to use the concept of the journal to help me stay focused and achieve a successful reboot. The most successful streak I had was about 120 days and it felt great. Since then I have been unable to recreate that same drive and commitment. In terms of today this is my third day of no porn/masturbation but I admit earlier today I edged to some not very explicit images (I changed my mobile DNS). Although disheartened I aim to redeem myself through this post. I am not too sure if I should set a month goal and then work from there or aim higher. Suggestions? My triggers are varied but one would be boredom/lying in bed. I don't want to make this too long so Ill end it here and hopefully will be posting soon. I am very open to any suggestions or general comments so feel free. That is all for now. Thank you very much for your time.

Sincerely,

Mause

 
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