Question: How to use girls to help get over PIED?

Hello friends, I have a question:

A lot of guys say that it really helped them get through their ED problems if they had an understanding girl by their side. I am fortunate enough to be able to call a girl over pretty much any time I want, so I was curious how you all used this to your advantage. I have one FWB in particular who is extremely chill about it and also very attractive (she's the main reason I'm trying to get over ED) so I'd love to invite her over more but I know my boner struggles are not up to the task of pleasuring her yet.

Some have said that it is NOT a good idea to have "sex tests" to see if things are working down there, so perhaps just spending the night and snuggling would be a good idea to help rewire my brain?

Any personal stories or advice would be greatly appreciated!

-Ben

I'm doing the same thing.  I just started having ED and just started dating a girl 2 weeks ago.
I started my very first reboot phase like 6 days ago so it's all new to me.  But I would say you should try sex as much as possible.  Especially while you have an understanding girl.  I think any exposure to real girls is good exposure, and will help push you further from porn and back to arousal from a real person.  There are ups and downs for me right now too but it only helps to increase confidence, which I feel is a huge part of ED.  My goal right now is healthy living.  Eating healthy, exercise, better sleep, NO PORN, and focusing on this one girl.  Let me know what you think,  I feel like this is the right direction.

I thought more about it and I wanted to add to what I said, or clarify a little more.  Making these interactions with these girls all about sex is maybe a little misguided. I'm in this new relationship too,  and I think the important part is realigning your brain to be close and open with someone.  Porn addiction is the exact opposite,  it feels shameful, it's isolating, and artificial.  THESE are the characteristics we have grown accustomed to and so the abrupt change in the physical and psychological context of sex life can make your brain shut down.  So I think it's good to desexualize your day-today, but it's important to strengthen your brain in the area of human contact, if that makes sense.  So, don't use these girls you have as a "dick test", try to focus more on the mental connection and just be present in the moment. 

Your post title speaks volumes on your relationship with women and how porn has affected you.  I am not meaning to be judgmental because it's not your fault....but I do want to help!

Rewiring is not about cumming inside a warm body.  Rewiring is about reigniting the pleasure and intimacy of sex with someone you care about.  If this girl is not someone you care about then don't invite her over because you will only be focused on your penis and that's not rewiring.  Think about porn and what the exact opposite of porn is.  Porn is about using others as visual candy to get off to.  Zero sensuality, zero connection and zero intimacy.  This is currently how your brain feels about women and sex in general.  Connection, sensuality (using your senses) and intimacy is the real juicy meat of rewiring .

Bibbity: I knew someone would say that and for that reason I was hesitant about the wording of my subject line. The fact of the matter for me is that I'm a horny college kid in a greek system full of attractive women, so I am simply not ready for the commitment of a relationship. I just want to clarify that I'm not the kind of guy who looks at women as sex objects - the few girls that I casually hook up with are "using" me as well. I am also legitimately good friends with them (we study, exercise, and watch movies together), and perhaps one day one of them will be my girlfriend, I'm just not ready for that yet.

Concentrate on feelings of intimacy when you are with this girl. How does she feel when you touch her or she touches you, how she smells, etc. Wire your brains pleasure center to her.
An understanding partner can be a massive help to reboot.

Find a nice girl that you care about, generate feelings if genuine affection, then split her in half.

Dr Fap

I appreciate the clarification and I am glad porn has not warped you too much but "hookup" culture is very much a biproduct of porn culture so think about it next time you want to hit it without strings.

First of all, we don't "use" girls. That would be pretty dishonest and, not something very respectable.

Instead, you can stop PMOing, obsessing over sex, focus on your life, and things should be fine. You'll find your way out, trust me. If you want to SKYROCKET your recovery. Become "sexless" for some weeks. I mean, forget about sex.

Do HIIT and weight lifting. Occasional fasting. Meditation. Relaxation. Good diet. Good sleep pattern. Good life style. Things will be better. If your case is not severe, you can even recover fully around the first month, and, you'll have a beautiful life.

I don't really test. The girls I meet for sex, I make clear that complicity and respect is a must, that I have sometimes ED. From there, I just plan to have fun, and if there's an issue, I get creative and please her in other ways. I don't plan sex, sex just happens, and I let it be natural. If ED happens then so be it, I can't help it short term. I stopped being anxious about it, and I don't think it's healthy to abstain from sex because you're scared it might go wrong, and it 's not healthy to go with someone who's just gonna hurt your ego neither.

My way of thinking : if I think too much about ED, it won't go away. That doesn't mean I shouldnt stop my bad habits, like watching porn. I think it's cool to think about ways of improving your sex life. As long as it doesn't make you anxious.