Hi I?m Paul and for half my life I?ve watched porn. I?m 41 years old now and I now realize it affects way more than I held possible. It started out meaningless but it hasn?t been for many years now. I?m married almost ten years and we have two kids. I?m blessed with my wife who is understanding up till now. She has caught me with my pants down on multiple occasions over the past years. Me watching porn wasn?t the biggest issue, but me lying over it was. It hurts the foundation of our relationship since trust is a main component in my opinion. I?ve tried to take things I my own hand and quit porn. I always relapsed after a few months. Beliefs were always strong at the beginning but faded along the way. I now understand that I can?t do it on my own and I need help. I hope I can find people who can relate to what I?m dealing with because I can?t find them in real life. Also keeping a journal will hopefully keep my beliefs up. I?m in reboot for the 6th day now and I am committed to this journey. I?m in this for so long that it has become a part of me and I wonder how I am without it.