First day

Sarah

New Member
My first day journal
Hello I'm 38 and female, professional mother, not sure how common that is as far as porn addiction goes. I have been watching porn since I was about 8. It goes up and down in waves and I'm watching it a lot right now and it's to the point where it drains me and I just want to not go straight to porn as soon as I can. I will tell myself I'm not doing it anymore then as soon as I can get the chance I'm back to it. I get the high then crash when I'm done. It's such a waste of my time but I think about sex all the time. It causes me more problems than anything. My boyfriend knows I watch porn, he doesn't , and he doesn't care but I don't think he realizes the connection between it and our sex life problems because he cannot fulfill my unrealistic expectations. Well I'm glad I found this website and I will try to begin my new life porn Free tomorrow.
 

Gabe Deem

Administrator
Staff member
Admin
Moderator
@ Sarah

Hello I'm 38 and female, professional mother, not sure how common that is as far as porn addiction goes.

Women are a big percentage of porn viewers now days. I've seen some stats that suggest that up close to 40% of women are using porn now.... and we are seeing an increase in women who are developing addictions and sexual dysfunctions from internet porn use/sex toy use.

You will find some other ladies here on the forums. However I have a feeling women hesitate even more than men do to make an account and post. So I'm proud of you for posting.. I hope it helps you and will surely help other women out there reading relate and know they are not alone.

Have a look at these two posts - http://www.yourbrainonporn.com/porn-problems-here-come-women

http://yourbrainonporn.com/vibrators-and-other-pleasures-when-moderation-fails

So you are not alone and I hope you find the information, encouragement and support you need here on the Nation.

I have been watching porn since I was about 8

I too started when I was 8... our adolescent brains were not prepared for that. Early sexual experiences have very powerful effects on our plastic brains as kids.

I will tell myself I'm not doing it anymore then as soon as I can get the chance I'm back to it. I get the high then crash when I'm done. It's such a waste of my time but I think about sex all the time.

It is great that you notice that about yourself. Being mindful of what is going on and being able to observe what happens is key to stopping it and re-directing your sexual energy towards your partner or other healthy things other than porn.

My boyfriend knows I watch porn, he doesn't , and he doesn't care but I don't think he realizes the connection between it and our sex life problems because he cannot fulfill my unrealistic expectations.

Well it sounds like your thoughts about sex need to drive you to your partner rather than porn. And you are now aware of this so that is a great start. Check out the informational videos on the home page of our site.

I'm glad you're here. Welcome to the Nation. Hope the best for you!

Much Love
 

Yelashade

Member
Hey Sarah,

Welcome to the forum! It's good that you've acknowledged the problem and are actively trying to reduce the impact porn has on your life. You are fortunate enough to have someone to get intimate with and he will really do well in assisting you with the "rewiring" process, so I'd suggest you tell him about your problem :). I'd also suggest you put a counter down, like me, to remind you of your targets and progress whenever you get the urge.

Best of luck on your journey!
 

hellexfire

Member
Sarah,

We're in the same boat sister. I'm rooting for you as much as I'm in my own corner. This is a battle; trust your struggle.
 
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