HELP!? I'm not addicted to porn but I am with my fetish?

I posted the last week, but didn't get much help. But the more I read on this site I learn.

I was I a three year relationship with a girl who liked my fetish, (foot fetish and femdom etc.) and for te last three years it's all I've masturbated or had sex too. I am able to have sex with her, but I think it's because there's the underlying turn on of the fetish , because I associate with her.

The problem is with any new girl I am unable to perform, I'm not aroused by normal vanilla stuff. But I don't masturbate to porn because I know how bad it is.


Am I in the same situation as someone who is a porn addict or what?

Can someone please give me some help or insight on what to do??

I can only give you my opinion.. In my opinion, porn can create unnatural fetishes and create weird urges. However, if you can only get aroused by this particular person, maybe you have deeper feelings for her that you might not be seeing. Cause sexual activity (what I heard) is about touch, feeling, and intimacy. You both enjoy this particular thing and you get "aroused" by only her. Which might mean it's cause you both have a similar interest. Although, porn still can create unnatural fetishes. So, is this something you feel is natural or do you feel this has been created? Try to see if you can differ the two. In my opinion, sex is about two people that have a connection, have intimacy, and are friends. Do you still occasionally watch "P?" if so than you may want to get rid of it completely to see if you have any changes in a couple of months. Just stay away from "P" and fantasies and focus on feeling and touch.

Here is a website/ youtube video that was already on this site on the front page... this actually mentions someone having a foot fetish and included that it was because of porn. Might be a bit confusing cause the guy wrote that he thought he was bisexual.. attracted to women and feet. In my opinion that isn't bisexuality but to him he must have felt that feet was in the category of gender. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XvyejdlmKpE

Just stay away from "P" cause it actually creates very strong delusions and can even keep you from dates because you are looking for that porn star image of a person and fetish (if that fetish was created and not natural.. it's you to find out if feet is a part of the body that you truly and honestly feel is natural or if it's been created... I have my opinion but it's your life and your opinion affects your life more than my opinion. if you want to ask about my opinion on all types of fetishes than you can ask but i'll give you my honest opinion that I find is true.) Keep trying to focus on the person you are with and focus on touch and intimacy rather than any types of images. I heard that our mind is actually supposed to be thought free (not saying all the time.) Hope that sorta helped and didn't create more anxiety..

Hey JO7. There are so many people posting on this site, that some questions get overlooked. Don't let that discourage you. Just be patient and keep posting until someone answers.

Do you think your fetish is innate, or has it been porn induced? It's very important that you reflect on this. Perhaps it's easier to think about when it started; before you started watching porn or after?

I have a fetish that I know I've had before I ever watched porn. While my sexual encounters are enhanced with the presence of this fetish object, if the fetish isn't present I can still have rewarding sex (or at least I could before I developed PIED).

You say you're not addicted to porn. How would you feel if I told you that you couldn't watch porn for a year? Give me your first, honest answer.

How often do you watch porn?

People might be able to give you more constructive advice with a little more information. I think the bottom line is that you need to stop watching porn to see if your fetish is porn induced or not.

sounds like you have wired yourself to get off to this one fetish only. was that from porn?