KittyHawk
Active Member
I can't believe it is over 2 years already since I started here my first journal. I will be turning 34 tomorrow and I am still addicted to PMO. I know PMO is to blame for my problems already 4-5 years and I still wasn't able to get rid of this curse. Two main things changed over last couple years though.
1) In a desperate attempt not to orgasm to P, I developed edging habit... no O, but PM sometimes for hours... not healthy at all, I know.
2) Buying smartphone just gave me another highway to P on demand and set me back for months.
I know my addiction cost me health, professional progress, lots of potential income, and ability to have normal sex with my wife. If I could just make a conscious decision to stop, I would sign up immediately. I hate how weak I am.
Today I relapsed after 14 days of no PMO. I did some short edging in that time period though.
I am trying to find all the triggers and analyze my behavior lately.
Risk factors / Triggers
1) being online (Laptop, smartphone, doesn't matter. I always disable all the P blockers in a feverish frenzy)
2) having time alone
3) not having O for cca 4 days (the urge is strongest on day 4)
4) recently having O after a longer abstinence (chaser effect)
5) being under stress (and I have plenty of it lately, big financial problems certainly don't help)
I am still trying to figure out if I have bigger chance going "cold turkey" or doing quick MO with no P every 4-5 days. So far it looks like I suck at both strategies.
Solutions I came up with lately:
I don't leave smartphone on my nightstand. I place it so far from my bed as possible for a night. It worked pretty well...mostly.
Trying to work out a watch comedies to burn stress hormones and create some healthy ones.
If you have some strategies/tools to cope with triggers, please don't hesitate to share.
1) In a desperate attempt not to orgasm to P, I developed edging habit... no O, but PM sometimes for hours... not healthy at all, I know.
2) Buying smartphone just gave me another highway to P on demand and set me back for months.
I know my addiction cost me health, professional progress, lots of potential income, and ability to have normal sex with my wife. If I could just make a conscious decision to stop, I would sign up immediately. I hate how weak I am.
Today I relapsed after 14 days of no PMO. I did some short edging in that time period though.
I am trying to find all the triggers and analyze my behavior lately.
Risk factors / Triggers
1) being online (Laptop, smartphone, doesn't matter. I always disable all the P blockers in a feverish frenzy)
2) having time alone
3) not having O for cca 4 days (the urge is strongest on day 4)
4) recently having O after a longer abstinence (chaser effect)
5) being under stress (and I have plenty of it lately, big financial problems certainly don't help)
I am still trying to figure out if I have bigger chance going "cold turkey" or doing quick MO with no P every 4-5 days. So far it looks like I suck at both strategies.
Solutions I came up with lately:
I don't leave smartphone on my nightstand. I place it so far from my bed as possible for a night. It worked pretty well...mostly.
Trying to work out a watch comedies to burn stress hormones and create some healthy ones.
If you have some strategies/tools to cope with triggers, please don't hesitate to share.