I?m not a porn addict.
I?ve told myself these words so many times. I can stop whenever I want. I don?t really have a problem. I don?t even like seeing penetration so is it really that bad? I think these are words that anyone with a problem uses and it?s only been tonight after I watched porn and felt awful that I finally decided I need to do something about this. Because this is been a part of my life since I was 13 years old and I?m now 31. I have two kids and a beautiful wife and we are working on our third child. Recently, sex has been robotic, automatic, generally unsatisfying and definitely not adventurous. If anyone has tried to conceive a child they know what I?m talking about. Procreative sex is about the least sexy thing there is. Which leaves me where I found myself tonight; in an empty hotel room on a business trip with a high-speed connection and a large screen on my iPhone X. I told my wife I loved her after we FaceTimed for half an hour and then I want about searching for erotic material. The sad thing is I don?t really even feel guilty anymore. I used to beat myself up and say this is the last time! I have to stop this! But after you say those words for nearly 2 decades with little success you just stop saying them. Because you know it isn?t the last time, if it was the last time would have happened long ago. I just know it?s not good for me and I know I don?t want to be doing this when I turn 41, but if nothing changes then nothing changes. Does anyone have any advice? Has anyone been in my shoes?
I?ve told myself these words so many times. I can stop whenever I want. I don?t really have a problem. I don?t even like seeing penetration so is it really that bad? I think these are words that anyone with a problem uses and it?s only been tonight after I watched porn and felt awful that I finally decided I need to do something about this. Because this is been a part of my life since I was 13 years old and I?m now 31. I have two kids and a beautiful wife and we are working on our third child. Recently, sex has been robotic, automatic, generally unsatisfying and definitely not adventurous. If anyone has tried to conceive a child they know what I?m talking about. Procreative sex is about the least sexy thing there is. Which leaves me where I found myself tonight; in an empty hotel room on a business trip with a high-speed connection and a large screen on my iPhone X. I told my wife I loved her after we FaceTimed for half an hour and then I want about searching for erotic material. The sad thing is I don?t really even feel guilty anymore. I used to beat myself up and say this is the last time! I have to stop this! But after you say those words for nearly 2 decades with little success you just stop saying them. Because you know it isn?t the last time, if it was the last time would have happened long ago. I just know it?s not good for me and I know I don?t want to be doing this when I turn 41, but if nothing changes then nothing changes. Does anyone have any advice? Has anyone been in my shoes?
