I agree that sex can be part of the healing.
I wondered about having sex early in the reboot, too, and it risked becoming an anxiety issue for me, especially since my wife had no notion of the source of my frequent ED and what I was undertaking here.
She initiated sex on day 24 of my no PMO. I was not cured by any means but the performance was better than it had been in a while, allowing for a short period of penetration. The key was to keep my focus on my wife and her sources of pleasure, thinking back to those things we did early on in our sexual life. Lots of foreplay - the tantric approach, I guess, to build up her pleasure. [Key here -- her pleasure, not some video stranger's]. Afterwards, a clear message -- nothing to be anxious about -- the healing had started.
Day 986 no PMO .. stick with the program ,.. it works!