Over 50s ?

I am currently in rebooting, day 30, and I am 57 yo. I would very much know if there are success stories from people in my age range (over 50), how long it really takes, how successful is recovery, problems, and more. Please only actual experiences, not messages starting with "I think that..." etc.

I feel better anyhow, do not feel any craves for relapsing, but it would be even more encouraging to know what I can reasonably expect at the end of this long journey.

Many thanks in advance!

I'm 57 and I'm at 107 days hardmode.  No P, No M, No O.

My wife and I fool around a lot, but it's mostly me doing stuff to her.

I've found that a lot of my anxiety and depression are gone.  I used to have a lot of trouble being around a lot of people or someplace noisy/busy.  I've relaxed a lot and I'm out and about all the time.

Best thing is my wife and I are closer, both physically and emotionally than ever before.  We're in love!

I had very bad PIED, and really didn't get much of an erection anytime at all.  That has, unfortunately, not improved.  I hit a big flatline at about two weeks and I had low libido and shrunken penis, which I've read is common.

The libido is better, but I have to be honest and say I have not had anything close to an erection this entire time.  Not sure if this is reboot/flatline related, or if my penis is just broken.

I've been to several medical doctors and I'm on testosterone treatments.  (Pellets inserted in my hip)

T-levels are supposed to be better, and the doctors haven't indicated any physical problems.  Just 'it happens at your age.'

BUT....

I'm not giving up.  I'm staying the course (NO PMO) until one of two things happens:

1.  I am cured of my PIED and I'm able to have normal sex with my wife.

or

2.  I die.

Doesn't matter to me which happens first, I'm not going back to porn, ever.


Best of luck to you!

Thank you for your accurate description 57yrold! We have the same age, only I do not have wife or girlfriend now, thus what will come after the reboot is a big question mark for me. However, like you I feel very motivated to reboot. I am at day 42 now, deep into the flatline. To hear more experiences by other peers who went before us through this path would be more than welcome.

42 days is a fantastic accomplishment!  Congratulations!

Stay strong, NO PMO, and KEEP GOING!


Best of luck!

Hi Marco

I'm 53 and I've been trying to heal for over 2 years. My first attempt at a reboot was a success. After only 35 days I was getting solid erections and was able to have sex with my girlfriend. I stupidly thought it was safe to go back to looking at porn again occasionally but I only brought on another bout of PIED.

I started again and had some quite long streaks of more than 90 days only to relapse to porn again. My relapses haven't been binges, just the occasional night masturbating to porn. I started again at the beginning of the year and I'm on day 51. I've got no libido but I've noticed some nocturnal erections returning.

The upshot of this is that I'm going to need a long period to recover. I'm sure of it. When I rebooted after 35 days there were no warning signs. I just got hard kissing my girlfriend and went for it. Perhaps it will be the same for you. You could be in a long flatline and then, out of the blue, recover. I hope so!

If I stumble across images which are sexual in any way I can feel myself getting hard, so I know the problem isn't physiological. My tackle seems to want to work if there are old triggers. Obviously, I immediately close any windows which are likely to cause me to relapse. The only thing I can suggest is to be patient.

In my experience, after long periods of abstinence my libido seems to come to life again and I get really strong cravings to masturbate to porn again. This is the reason for my previous relapses. This time I really need to stay focused because I feel pretty shit that I've been at this rebooting stage for more than 2 years.

I'm happy to answer any questions if you need me to.

Good luck!

Thank you for sharing your experience and for the useful comments, MM1  . I started the hard reboot almost 60 days ago and I continue to see positive signs of recovering, but I have no GF and it is then difficult for me to evaluate the situation. In fact, I started this first (and I hope also last) hard reboot because I felt totally humiliated when I could not have any erection for four consecutive nights with my ex GF, whom I liked very much. She has just thrown me out of her life, no support at all, while from what you write I think your GF was more supportive (correct ?). Do you think that a motivation like GF's support helps to get a faster recovery, according to your personal experience? Other people here have supportive wives, and they seem to gain further motivation from this.

Hi Marco.

While my girlfriend obviously knows about my erectile problems she doesn't know the real cause of them. I just can't bring myself to discuss it with her. Some people claim that you can reboot quicker with a partner. It's a terrible thing to say but I feel sick when my girlfriend tries to be intimate with me. It makes me very sad to write that. I know it's porn induced because when I recovered the first time after 35 days I couldn't get enough of her contact and kisses.

I think we all fight this alone in a certain sense. It's nice to have someone who will support you along the way and my girlfriend is very understanding with regards my ED, at least for now.

I think if you are in a relationship then the moment you feel that you want to be intimate with a real person you can act upon your urges. This can give you some idea of the level of recovery. I think that if you are outside a relationship trying to recover there is always the anxiety that you might not be able to perform when confronted with a new, willing partner. At least, this would be a huge source of anxiety for me.

60 days is a real achievement and you should be proud of yourself for having gone this long. As you say, without a partner then it's very difficult to assess your progress. Just out of curiosity, what positive signs are you seeing? Apart from a raging erection this morning which lasted quite some time, I'm not sure if I can report any real positive signs. The first time I rebooted the most obvious sign for me was getting spontaneous erections during the day, even at work. This was something I hadn't experienced since my teens.

This is a shit journey but as the saying goes, 'a journey of a thousand miles begins with one step'. We just have to keep taking our one step each day and the destination gets a little closer. It's just frustrating that we don't know exactly how many steps that will take.

Stay strong and you will recover. I have no doubt about this.

Thank you for your clear points MM1  ! The "positive signs", in addition to the regular morning woods which we all experience, are a unpredictable libido which I started to feel recently, for instance when I cross a woman and smell her good parfum, or when I saw the naked neck and shoulder of a colleague the other day. I feel the beginning of an erection which however lasts only few minutes.

'I feel the beginning of an erection which however lasts only few minutes.'

That right there is a clear sign that something is changing for the better. I hope you complete your reboot soon and find yourself in a good relationship.