Reboot Best Practices Question

Hi Everyone!

I have continued reading as i go through the first few weeks of my reboot but still have many questions.  2 weeks in so far. no relapses, definitely flat lined but do respond to physical stimulus from my girlfriend or cuddling/grinding etc.  Only mistake i have made is Orgasming via oral sex 3 times over the last 2 weeks when the porn i masturbated to was almost primarily oral sex etc.  Cutting that piece out with the support of my girlfriend and driving on with the journey.

link to my story:  http://legacy.rebootnation.org/index.php?topic=15968.0

However i am wondering what others found non detrimental to the dopamine/mental reset from their reboot.  Kissing, cuddling, sensual showers, massages, handjobs? are they all acceptable? should i try sex even if not successful?

Or is the initial most important part not to orgasm at all for any reason? to really jump start the biochemistry, e.g wet dream etc etc

Hi buddy,
First of all, well done on your pogres!
I think any form of non-penertrative intimacy with your partner is beneficial to your reboot. The goal, one of them anyway, is to rewire our neuro-pathways to respond to real sexual experiences as opposed to the filthy scumbuckets in pixilated form on our screens. When engaging in anything physical with your partner, concentrate on them and your feelings of affection for them. There will be a great difference.
As for the getting sucked off thing, if you are imagining the porn you used to get off to while shes sucking you off it is bad. Dont try to recreate any porn fantasy.
Personally I wouldnt try having sex yet, but again everyone is different so its entirely up to you. There are risks, however. If you are unable to get a willy hard enough to slam her with it could be detremental to the reboot as it may lead to a loss of confidence. I would wait until I am far enough into my reboot not to even consider the possibility of not getting and maintaining an erection.

Disagree with Fappy, (for god's sake change that name!)

Your obsession with porn was oral sex, and now you are using oral sex to reboot? Does that sound intuitively right to you? I'd say there is basically zero chance of that experience not involving involuntary reference to your porn memory bank. You'd be far better off rewiring to full body touching and intercourse where your face is close to her face - that way you maintain the personal intimacy and mind to mind connection. You can still see her face, read her expressions, talk and whisper to each other and maintain the personal connection. Oral sex is distant - she is down there, while you are up here, thinking god knows what and inevitably imagining things that happened in porn you've watched - like how you plan to ejaculate. That's porn, man. Don't kid yourself, that's not rewiring.

For a strong wielded person the most detrimental fact would be bad intimate relationship and weak interpersonal relationship. you need to be strong enough to cut the women who do not put any effort in you during sex or in general. You cant enjoy the intimacy if you are in relationship with someone who pretends to be dead during sex unless you want necrophilia. The other thing is general relationship with other people like participating  in group activities, having friends and etc. The more you lack relationship, the more you get attracted to sex as unhealthy replacement

Thank you for your thoughts @Fappy, @Malando, @ Mroctupus,

I may have typed incorrectly above, i was 100% agreeing that allowing my girlfriend to perform oral sex was absolutely detrimental! As of a few days ago we agreed to cut that out so that the reboot is a focus on successful normal sex to completion (in time )

Thank you for the insight of focusing on the relationship, intimacy in general.  Avtivities, fun, friends etc.

My girlfriend and I have decided to no orgasm for me in any way and to wait until my birthday in December/Christmas to give it our first shot at successful sex.

Until then will be kissing, cuddling, hugging, hands traveling to check response/stimulus reaction but no completion period. Conversation and fun!

The journey continues!  Thank you all!

Sounds good, Karate! I think that will really help your rewiring process. Good luck!