neuroaddict
Member
Had something interesting happen last night during some intimate time between me and gf. She started whispering something in my ear she thought would turn me on and help me climax. I didn't stop her. I haven't told her I'm trying to break my porn addiction (she knows about it, but doesn't know a fraction of how bad it's gotten), and I didn't want to kill the mood or embarrass her. It became clear to me though, both during the moment and afterwards, that a conversation definitely needs to happen, because storytelling like that may as well be porn to me, and I can't control my porn use IN ANY FORM. Stories activate all the same mental images as porn, and they can easily take me out of the experience of physical intimacy and transport me to fantasyland, and, for this addict, fantasyland is one stop short of pornville -- it's dangerous territory. This is a real bummer, because I used to love that shit. I wonder if one day I'll be able to reincorporate it into my sex life, in a healthy way? I doubt it, though. Love to hear y'alls thoughts on this.