W
Warrior74
Guest
Thank you to all those who have gone ahead of me and shared your stories. Your words have spoken to me clear and true - this is a fight that can be won.
In May of this year, I finally admitted that my secret life of PMO and extreme porn is not just a lusty hobby but has been a source of shame, guilt and pain. I have hurt myself and I have hurt those I love, most notably my wonderful wife. I have had this secret for over 20 years, and the extreme tastes I have developed have led me to act out in ways that now make me shudder to think about. I have had PIED for about 10 years.
I quit cold turkey, no porn, no PMO and no more cheating. I?ve had a lot of withdrawal symptoms, the brain fog was real bad at first, now I?m in flatline. Today is day 167 and I am never going back. I have recently started to get morningwood again and I hope that someday I will be able to regain a real sex life (only with my wife).
Today I started counselling, realising that my issues are rooted in some difficult childhood experiences. I do take responsibility for the choices I made as an adult, but I hope that by resolving my childhood issues I can get a better understanding of how I got to where I am.
I am grateful to my wife for not giving up on me, and to Gabe and all the other guys who have been brave enough to speak out about their struggles. We are all brothers and we are all in this together.
Update: today is day 168. After my counselling session yesterday I was feeling pretty high last night and earlier today. This afternoon that started to wear off and I started feeling negative, but I remembered how far I?ve come and my promise to myself that I?m never going back. I have help and I have hope. I can do this.
In May of this year, I finally admitted that my secret life of PMO and extreme porn is not just a lusty hobby but has been a source of shame, guilt and pain. I have hurt myself and I have hurt those I love, most notably my wonderful wife. I have had this secret for over 20 years, and the extreme tastes I have developed have led me to act out in ways that now make me shudder to think about. I have had PIED for about 10 years.
I quit cold turkey, no porn, no PMO and no more cheating. I?ve had a lot of withdrawal symptoms, the brain fog was real bad at first, now I?m in flatline. Today is day 167 and I am never going back. I have recently started to get morningwood again and I hope that someday I will be able to regain a real sex life (only with my wife).
Today I started counselling, realising that my issues are rooted in some difficult childhood experiences. I do take responsibility for the choices I made as an adult, but I hope that by resolving my childhood issues I can get a better understanding of how I got to where I am.
I am grateful to my wife for not giving up on me, and to Gabe and all the other guys who have been brave enough to speak out about their struggles. We are all brothers and we are all in this together.
Update: today is day 168. After my counselling session yesterday I was feeling pretty high last night and earlier today. This afternoon that started to wear off and I started feeling negative, but I remembered how far I?ve come and my promise to myself that I?m never going back. I have help and I have hope. I can do this.