Could I be the oldest guy here?

eds125

Member
40 and up seems like kids - I'm 72. I have a wife 20 years my junior and a 13 year old daughter. We've been married 24 years and together for 28. I started most everything late in life except porn. At 13 I found a fake plastic camera in my dad's jacket with pictures of naked women - ugly ones at that. Then came girly mags, then cheap erotic literature, then more explicit girly mags, then videos, then DVDs and finally internet, which had the benefit of saving me lots of money. Sounds like a long career.
My wife and I haven't engaged in sex, for a loooong time. I can't recall when my ED began but I seem to have many potential causes. Have been taking statins and blood pressure meds for many years and I read they can contribute to ED. We raised our daughter with "attachment" parenting which means she shared our bed for 10 years. That doesn't exactly make for a sexual playground and puts the wife on the Madonna platform.
My wife discovered my extensive collection of DVDs about 8 years ago and tried to tell me that that was the cause of my ed.  I didn't listen. 
About three  years ago, realizing she needed sexual fulfillment, I told her I'd agree to DADT. She told me she didn't feel she could get laid if she showed up naked in a bar. About 3 months ago she shared that she was having two affairs and that in fact all her life she has been polyamorous but sublimated that lifestyle for our marriage. But she was now "out" and willing to engage in a loving/sexual relationship if it should happen - and two are. It was a wake up call for me that I had neglected a beautiful women who loved me enough to remain with me in spite of my failings (so to speak) and who again insisted that  porn was the cause of my ED.  She did the research and pointed me to this forum. So now as a monogamous man I'm struggling with polyamory as well as ED. Don't know what will happen with our relationship around polyamory but I do know I want to beat this ED problem. In spite of my age, I am in good shape and most people think I'm fiftyish and obviously I am still interested in sex.
I'm grateful for this forum. I see that many of you guys have been POM free for much longer than 90 days but I don't see much regarding whether your ED has been conquered.
I look forward to hearing from my brothers, being responsive, supportive and as helpful as I can. Thanks!!
BTW - my wife just shared with me her extensive library of erotic literature.  Guess she has had her own addiction? I skimmed a few of the books but didn't really get into any as "any" stimulation like that is out, right? Wonder if I'd stayed addicted to literature instead of visuals if ED would have happened? Any thoughts?
 

sodonewithit

Active Member
Hey buddy! .  You've got to drop it all or else the recovery won't work.  Time is the issue needed for healing, I'm 7 months in and can assuredly say this works.  No masturbating at all again but just straight sex. 
 

PIED64

Member
Hey eds125,

Glad to have you here!  I agree with sodonewithit, it all has to go.  I wanted to speak to your question about ED being conquered.  I am 51 and I have been on blood pressure meds for a few years as well, so not sure how much (if at all) that contributed to the ED to begin with.  I am only 40 days PMO free into this journey thus far, but I can tell you that on my last encounter with the wife 3 days ago things were greatly improved over even a few weeks ago.  Achieved a strong 90% + erection and maintained a good 80% + erection right through VP to O.  To sum this up, I have gone from a noodle to a respectable erection during intercourse in 40 days without PMO.  I know that individual results vary, but I am extremely pleased with the improvements thus far.  So is the wife!  My best to you on your journey!

Onward and Upward!
 

eds125

Member
Hey Thanks for the encouragement. No matter what, I will continue on this journey as from all I can tell from this forum it is the ONLY way. I'm in. Glad you're doing so well so quickly.
 

Phase2

Well-Known Member
Welcome buddy. Check out the success forum on here for some encouraging news. I have a post on there that describes my first 90 days. I do think this process works, but you really have to commit and it takes some time and perseverance. And that means cutting out all the artificial stimulants, including your wife's stash. Learn everything. Go to yourbrainonporn.com and go for it 100%. Good luck!
 

skipper

Member
Hi  buddy. I think joining this forum and sharing our experiences can be very good to overcome our addictions.
I agree with other people here about the dangers of your wife's erotic literature library.

About the polyamorous, it's hard for me to tell, there's an extense branch of amateur porn about that topic, so maybe you can have a deep self analysis of your own feelings about it.

But the most important thing is to keep doing the good job!!

Greetings.
 

olafthewise

Active Member
wait; a kid in your bed for 10 years??!! WTF? I don't like my kids looking at my bed, let alone sleep in it. I'm nude in bed so I never allowed any kid in my bed ever! Lock on my
ED has several causes, but porn is a big one.
masturbation is optional since experts say to not use pictures during masturbation, but a good two weeks off all material and sex only with wife is good advice!
remember to limit time that you use computer, eliminate any explicit magazines including swimsuit and lingerie ads. Watch some sci fi or other adventures movies for awhile while you launch this anti porn thing.
 

Brooklyn Jerry

Active Member
I have to say although I watched porn since I was a kid it never caused any erection problems. In fact it may have helped me be sexually satisfied during my married years, when I would have been temped to stray when our sex life was not frequent enough due to life issues. After my wife passed away imdont used to PMO and had no problems getting hard. It when I met a new lady that I realized I couldn't have sex and PMO. Imwent to a dr and got Viagra to help .Somehow I found out about PMO ED and have since doing so don't need any drugs to have real sex .Not surprisingly the dr I went to specialized in treating ED never asked about my masturbation schedule.
 
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