Author Topic: My Turn to Start 10 July 2017  (Read 7475 times)

TakeActionNow

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Re: My Turn to Start 10 July 2017
« Reply #375 on: November 27, 2017, 08:16:33 PM »
Here's a worthwhile reflection. When were my HAPPIEST moments ?
1. When i deleted my collection on 9/7/2017
2. When i deleted a portable drive and dumped my DVDs I forgot about
3. When I watched some P,, got aroused, M abit, did not O, stopped. and  didnt follow through. The next day i realized i had it in me to make hard stops.
4. downloaded a P. A few days later deleted it without watching.

Conclusion:

a. The process is slow, but it is happening.
b. personal grounding is happening. I can feel it. Not so floaty and idealistic now.
c. The long term sense of happiness from achieving  the above is very telling. It tells me I DONT WANT PMO !!!
« Last Edit: November 27, 2017, 10:28:21 PM by TakeActionNow »
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Re: My Turn to Start 10 July 2017
« Reply #376 on: November 28, 2017, 03:24:45 AM »
Boredom is a symptom of irresponsibility.
You are not engaged
It is not other people's fault or responsibility that you are not engaged
Either you found a wrong fit or you are not creating interest to improve, know more, do better.
Consider PMO.
Any boredom? No
Running? No
With friends? No

It is not what outside gives us, it is what we give ourselves
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IWantToLive

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Re: My Turn to Start 10 July 2017
« Reply #377 on: November 28, 2017, 09:04:44 AM »
Poignant reflections that applies to so many of us!

Keep staying accountable,

-I
When the going gets tough, the tough get going

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Re: My Turn to Start 10 July 2017
« Reply #378 on: November 28, 2017, 09:54:07 AM »
These days i am happier.
No pmo means no post o cravings
That's less suffering and attachments

I am also seeking more difficult stuff, like half marathons. The more toughness we put ourselves through the tougher we become
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Re: My Turn to Start 10 July 2017
« Reply #379 on: November 28, 2017, 08:41:02 PM »
An interesting life is an inquisitive and creative life
Try somethings new, difficult, different, distant, challenging
Dont keep doing the same
Reach out, be open.

We cant bring our time or money to our grave, so its meaningful to spend it where it matters: experiences
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Re: My Turn to Start 10 July 2017
« Reply #380 on: November 29, 2017, 01:02:06 AM »
Nothing hold us back more than our self esteem.

When we have high self esteem, we feel good about ourselves and want to do more.
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Re: My Turn to Start 10 July 2017
« Reply #381 on: November 29, 2017, 04:32:54 AM »
My low self esteem is blocking my success.
Becasue i think i am not good enough,
I believe i am not good enough
And i become not good enough
Procrastination and lowered efforts follow
There is little faith in possibility of success.
It is a confirmed cycle.

Need to stop this
This belief is wrong
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Re: My Turn to Start 10 July 2017
« Reply #382 on: November 29, 2017, 05:45:07 AM »
Low self esteem leads to lowered effort because of expectation of failure.
Eyes are on failure not success
Energy is low
Mood is low
Body mind and soul geared for failure
Will weakens
Dependence and neediness sets in
Discipline and resolve crumbles
There is no fight.

But is esteem truth?
No. It is merely perception.

Its like body telling you pain and you accept it.


How to overcome all these negative mental afflictions?

1. Dont believe your mind
2. Engage everything
3. Failure is acceptable
4. Try at all costs
5. Generate inner energy
6. Make effort
7. Have goals
8. Have resolve

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Re: My Turn to Start 10 July 2017
« Reply #383 on: November 29, 2017, 11:55:13 PM »
Reboot is good because it is really about getting to know myself better.

I am more sensitive to my moods and thoughts.
I am paying attention to all sorts of effects on me and finding solutions to address them.

I need to stay true to these following personal principles:
i live only 1 life
have pride and self respect
dont be so hard on myself
transform myself

There is nothing more degrading than giving in to our cravings without respecting ourselves.
I have only 1 life.
Let me live a life i can be proud of.
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Re: My Turn to Start 10 July 2017
« Reply #384 on: November 29, 2017, 11:57:07 PM »
addiction is a behavior that makes you believe that everything is going to be alright.
Thats not true.
We are where we are based strictly on the choices that we've made.
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Re: My Turn to Start 10 July 2017
« Reply #385 on: November 30, 2017, 08:29:12 PM »
1. Habit drives behavior.
Be very clear what when why how you do things.
> develop the habit of being watchful of your time and activities.
Where do they lead you to ?
What is the outcome ?
What do you desire to achieve ?

2.  Esteem determines your outcome
Low self esteem has many detrimental outcomes
> avasiveness, defensiveness, negativity, avoidance etc
> results in procrastination because we think we are not ready/good enough. No one is ready/good enough. Do it now. There is little time left. This is the moment.
> The most silly thing is that esteem is not real. it is just a perception, an opinion.
So change your opinion !

High self esteem :
engagement, confidence, involvement, enjoyment, results

You are simply who you believe yourself to be.

3. pride is what you give yourself
> if you have low pride, you pick us left over scraps
> if you have high pride, people will raise themselves to meet you where you stand.
Have pride. You deserve better.
Dont take it if it is not good enough for  you.

4. slow down and reflect where you are and where you are going
collect your memories of your strength and successes
they define you more than what you dont have

5. be clear what you dont want
knowing and being clear with what we dont want helps us to steer clear of its negatives outcomes.
Goals, effort and achievement are more important than cravings and desires.
Only they give you longer term happiness and satisfaction.
« Last Edit: November 30, 2017, 08:33:49 PM by TakeActionNow »
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Re: My Turn to Start 10 July 2017
« Reply #386 on: November 30, 2017, 09:27:47 PM »
Procrastinating from stopping?
Realize that you are also procrastinating from other successes in life.

1. Make hard effort
2. Force yourself
3. Have a plan and follow through
4. Be present and engaged
5. Single focus

> This is like long distance running :)
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Re: My Turn to Start 10 July 2017
« Reply #387 on: December 01, 2017, 04:50:52 PM »
Important thoughts
1. I'm suffering because I'm thinking too short term. I need to have more longer term thinking to guide myself in perseverance and not be so myopic in what i am going through.

2. I need greater change and diversity in my life to keep inspiring and challenge me. Change includes finding out where or who these new things are.

3.greater clarity in what i want and what i don't want.
Cant keep remaining as a sailboat without a rudder.

4. Esteem and engage. Pride and self respect. More more more of these.

Q. Why am i not celebrating my life? What are my hinderences? How do i dig myself out of this?
« Last Edit: December 01, 2017, 05:31:04 PM by TakeActionNow »
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Re: My Turn to Start 10 July 2017
« Reply #388 on: December 01, 2017, 05:45:39 PM »
There's a reason why we're drawn to pmo. It feels so good (huge price to pay afterwards though)

Which begs the question... Why (does the rest of life feel not so good) ?

Solve that and we should be home free.


Biggest question i have now is self love.
That esteem question has a deep root: i dont like myself. If i dont like myself or what i do, I'll always be seeking outside help or change. Thats never sustainable. Its dependence, neediness, weak, procrastinating. And I'll continue this dislike.

Perhaps self love must come from discipline.
Pmo is one of indulgence. But there is no sense of achievement. And it upsets the mind and spirit.
« Last Edit: December 01, 2017, 05:50:58 PM by TakeActionNow »
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Re: My Turn to Start 10 July 2017
« Reply #389 on: December 01, 2017, 07:56:20 PM »
Pmo is one of want. I want this and i want that.
But i didnt deal with equal focus and intensity what i dont want.
And i didn't deal with equal focus and intensity what else i want.
I want friendship
I want self sustainability
I want self growth
I want intrinsic happiness
I want to freedom to be myself
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Re: My Turn to Start 10 July 2017
« Reply #390 on: December 04, 2017, 06:52:42 PM »
Everything is habitual. Break the habit and free yourself.

Pmo is really a practice in feeling sorry for ourself.

Everyone knows the best way to feel good about ourself is to work hard and be good in whatever we do.

Being honest with ourselves is the most important.
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Re: My Turn to Start 10 July 2017
« Reply #391 on: December 05, 2017, 09:14:33 PM »
Are you PMOing to feel sorry for yourself or
are you taking matters into your own hands and creating a better life for yourself?

Satisfaction only comes from achievement
and achievement comes only from effort

so if you want to feel good about yourself, stop dwelling and indulging.
Get your act together and do some difficult stuff
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Strikeatruepath

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Re: My Turn to Start 10 July 2017
« Reply #392 on: December 06, 2017, 06:11:11 AM »
Hi TAN

Yeah its good to strive for and achieve something worthwhile and success can give us satisfaction and a sense of achievement.

Also worthwhile I  think is to really allow ourselves to enjoy something healthy -a nice meal, a hot bath, a good book or whatever. This can be used as a reward for taking a step towards a goal ("deferred gratification") -or, just for its own sake as an expression of self love and care. By being kind to ourselves we are affirming that we are worthwhile and deserving human beings.

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Re: My Turn to Start 10 July 2017
« Reply #393 on: December 06, 2017, 04:56:05 PM »
Strike,
you are absolutely right.

PMO has trained us to focus satisfaction on one activity that neither benefits nor satisfy.
Moreover, PMO doesn't reward effort and endurance, leaving us weak, dependent, avoiding and not trying. We've become very poor caretakers of ourselves.

Good house carers:
- prune the weeds daily
- make effort to keep the place clean
- spend time and money to paint and repair
- spend time and money to upkeep and buy proper things
- work hard and is proud of their achievements
- study and make themselves better
- invite others to their home, and is proud about it.

Like good house carers, we can do the same and be good self carers:
- work hard daily and collect our successes
- learn to feel good about ourselves intrinsically, and not depend on external endorsement
- have pride and self respect and dignity
- take the time to care properly. Early rest, a good meal, good company.
- look, think and be positive. Stop all negativity

Thank you for this good reminder.
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Re: My Turn to Start 10 July 2017
« Reply #394 on: December 06, 2017, 05:06:55 PM »
My breakthroughs:

realizing Negativity
understanding self love, care, worth, respect
discovering the true joys of being truly engaged for the sake of success
understanding pride, self respect and independence. PMO is an act of self pity and dependency.

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Re: My Turn to Start 10 July 2017
« Reply #395 on: December 07, 2017, 06:33:50 AM »
Low self esteem, self pity, low pride, low self respect and feeling sorry for oneself are the worst!!!
They waste time and energy!
They make us ineffective and inefficient!
Needy and dependent when we should be strong and independent!

Have pride! Have interest in ourselves!
Get our act together! Get things done!
You know what's the best song ever?
The greatest love of all!
Go read the lyrics!
« Last Edit: December 07, 2017, 07:10:43 AM by TakeActionNow »
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Re: My Turn to Start 10 July 2017
« Reply #396 on: December 07, 2017, 03:51:08 PM »
Pmo is release:
Release from caring
Release from responsibilities
Release from reality
Release from engagement
>It's selfish, self centered behavior

What are we left with after release?
No achievements
No self worth
No connection
>We end up with self pity and low self esteem
Weak and hollow, empty and needy

Goals have been replaced by cravings and indulgence
Pride replaced by cravings
Long term success replaced by short terms neediness

Struggle replaced by giving up early
Tolerance replaced by intolerance
Positivity replaced by negativity.

Pmo teaches us to run away
It doesnt teach us to stick with the plan, to endure, to see things through, to be committed.

This is the truth about pmo release
« Last Edit: December 07, 2017, 04:02:03 PM by TakeActionNow »
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Re: My Turn to Start 10 July 2017
« Reply #397 on: December 07, 2017, 06:57:32 PM »
Pmo is built on a premise that the quality of our joy, care and happiness is based on what others give us, not what we give ourselves.

Under this premise, how will we ever know what we truly want, what truly matters to us, and what is it that we can give ourselves?
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Re: My Turn to Start 10 July 2017
« Reply #398 on: December 08, 2017, 05:07:29 PM »
Interesting thought TAN.

Using porn is living by proxy. Even the proxy is a fake proxy that has toxic nature. So, habitual porn use is really a case of life hijacked. We need to assert our life, our real life, and experience it's good, bad, and everything in between. That's how we will really find out what we like and want.

-I
« Last Edit: December 08, 2017, 05:09:29 PM by IWantToLive »
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Re: My Turn to Start 10 July 2017
« Reply #399 on: December 08, 2017, 06:42:56 PM »
That's right IWTL!

just 1 day away from pmo and we'd be filled with personal strength and belief.

There is renewed drive and focus to get things done.

When things are done we are filled with confidence to do and achieve more.

And when we achieve more we dont need stupid stuff like pmo to make ourselves feel good cos we already are feeling great.

Pmo is just habit. Break the habit and we break the dependency.
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