Journal of a 3 Decade Porn Addict

Job is such long inconsistant and hours. so much down time between loads gotta find new ways of dealing with fatigue and boredom. At least my mood is starting to regulate. First week was hell. My emotions were all over the place. Not sure how much of that wasnt a reaction to traci telling me she thought it was over. Thank god we start counseling tues. Shes starting to open up. She's seeing a change but she is still leary of letting me back in. I have to stay clean and focused on our marriage. I pray
she comes around.

wow its been easy until today. i was researching my p problem. looking up stuff on you tube. came across a vid of some hot new starlet at the avn awards. MAN!!!! did the urge ever kick in. but i was strong and passed it by wirhout clicking on it, or looking her up.. boy that really sunk it in that i have a serious problem. As if the marital issues hadnt.

Great work on 2 weeks no PMO!

You had a tough day today... that happens , unfortunately. Try to watch the creep in of softer images that cause triggers. That does not help your recovery one bit, playing with fire even soft images usually ends in relapse. So try to just maintain a big safety zone.

Remember you ultimate goal is reestablishing a good healthy sex life with your real life partner! Accept no pixel substitute!!

Congrats on 2 weeks!  Stay strong, friend!

No P No M in 2 weeks been with wife almost daily last 3 days thougj cant get on same page. cant remember last time i went this long with no release. going up the wall.

hcobra1972 said:

No P No M in 2 weeks been with wife almost daily last 3 days thougj cant get on same page. cant remember last time i went this long with no release. going up the wall.

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Cobra, just some thoughts,

Most everyone agrees, early in the reboot is the toughest time, there's no getting around it, the most important thing is to hang in there and just don't give in no matter what. PMO-ing will not solve a thing at all. It does get easier for everyone, but when is different for everyone.

What helped me in really tough times was to get really active on the forum, read other's journals, I would look for guys in need of help, it helped me to not be so focused on myself and my problem.

I went to YBOP website, watched the videos over and over, read, learned, educated myself.

Stay strong. This addiction can be conquered.

I second that. I made the forums a hobby of mine for a while, I actually spent too much time on them. But it really helped with the early stages, when there is still a lot of uncertainty if this really works. After I experienced for myself, that a reboot works, the forums became less of a focus, yet I like to return and read up and try to help other guys if I can by sharing what I saw on my path so far.

So cobra, stay strong. I gets easier with time. But for now, you need to take it one day at a time.

How's it going, Cobra?  Keep in touch.  We are here for you, man!