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Sorry If this is long, but it's been a long fucking neverending road for me and I really need your help. I'm 26 years old and I've been fully impotent for almost 5 years now. I am a very very severe case of what I'm thinking has to be PIED, I have no idea what's going on with me if it isn't. I was hoping you could weigh in on my case and give me some advice because I'm losing hope and it's ruining my life.
I started watching high speed internet porn at the age of about 11. As a kid I was super hypersexual and once I got that first taste of online porn I was hooked. It didn't take long before I was jacking off multiple times a day everyday to that shit. It was a crutch for me and was a Way for me to cope with whatever problems or stress I was feeling. I remember in highschool basically running home from school everyday to jack off to porn. I was also an extremely late bloomer, so I imagine my frontal cortex was even less developed than a regular kids my age. I didn't get a ton of girls in highschool because I always looked very young for my age. Which just fueled my porn addiction even more.
Fast forward to college and I continued to beat my dick like it owed me money. Lost my virginity my first year of college to this girl after the bar. Never had any issues getting an erection, Infact, I couldn't stop getting them and was constantly horny.I was so desensitized that I couldn't even cum and I had to picture porn in order to finish. This continued for the next couple years. I'd get laid once in a while and be able to last forever and would have to imagine porn to cum, all the while continuing my extreme porn habbit and jacking off multiple times a day. But no issues whatsoever with erections.
Fast forward to my final year of college, I was 21 at the time. I took this girl home from the bar to fuck and I suddenly couldn't get an erection, AT ALL. I didn't think much of it at the time and just figured that I had too much to drink. This was the first time that had ever happened to me. In the morning I still couldn't get it up to have sex with her. When she left I tried jacking off and couldn't even give myself an erection. And that is how suddenly my erections have come and gone. I haven't been the same since.
I continued to Jack off to porn everyday with a limp dick praying things would get better, but they didn't. Finally went to a doctor a few months later and I assumed there was something physical wrong with me. Doctor said everything was fine. Blood tests came back fine and he even did an ultrasound of my vasculature which all looked normal. He said that it was likely stress and in my head. The only thing that was stressful at that time for me was school, everything else in my life was and has been prefect and stress free. Nothing that I felt could have caused this. And I feel like I would be able to get an erection at least sometimes when jacking off if stress was the culprit. So I continued to beat my lifeless dick everyday to porn wondering what the fuck was wrong with me.
Took About a year later to discover YBOP and thOught finally I had the answer to my problems. For the first year I did a shitty reboot where I Would still watch porn sometimes (cut way back) but would still masterbate (with a limp dick) to check if I could get hard. Would watch porn once in a while to check and still couldn't get hard to porn. Tried having sex several times in which I couldn't get hard at all. I never had any morning or nocturnal erections. I was fully impotent. I ended up getting some Viagra from my doctor which worked amazing. I'd take half a pill and could Smash coconuts with it.
I ended up moving away from home for work and my dick was still completely broken unless I took Viagra. Decided to seriously give nofap a try. I've basically cut out porn completely for the past 2 years. At the start I would still masterbate every few weeks or so to check my progress, and I still couldn't get it up at all, sometimes would get a half erection but nothing to write home about. I was also having sex using Viagra with different girls having one night stands couple times a month or so. So was basically doing easy mode nofap. Went to another urologist who basically confirmed what the previous doctor confirmed, that I was physically fine. I asked him if he thought porn/excessive masterbation could have been the cause and he said that it's not possible and he also said it was in my head and it was probably because entire body was stuck in a sympathetic response. But at the time everything in my life was fine and the only thing that was wrong and was giving me stress was the fact that my dick didn't work.
I ended up getting a girlfriend. We dated for about 2 years and throughout that time I was constantly taking Viagra behind her back to have sex with her, which is the worst feeling in the world. Throughout this time I didn't watch porn, maybe once or twice, and I didn't masterbate at all. But we did have sex a few times a week at least. Still was getting zero erections without Viagra. Not even morning wood or nocturnal erections. I ended up telling her everything and what I was going through. At first she was super supportive. I told her I couldn't have sex for a while because I wanted to do the hardmode reboot to try and fix myself. After a couple of months I very infrequently got nocturnal erections where I'd wake up in the middle of the night with a hard on. This was very infrequent, maybe once every other week or so. But nothing in the morning or during the day. A couple months into my reboot for my first time I was able to get an erection with my girlfriend for the first time without viagra. It took tons of foreplay and a long ass blow job to get it though. We took it really slow and I had sex with her without cumming because I didn't want to lose my progress. We continued this for a couple more months. Majority of time I would fail but sometimes could get a slow to reach erection and we'd have sex without me cumming. Throughout the day my dick still felt 100% dead and was shriveled and did not get any morning erections but got infrequent nocturnal erections. We ended up breaking up, mainly because I wanted to focus on my reboot and wanted to cut out all sexual stimulation because progress was super slow and felt like it was Delaying my reboot.
Fast forward to now. It's been 9 months that I've gone complete hard mode. No porn no masterbation no sex. Been no porn and no masterbation for close to 2 years already before this. Been no orgasm for the past 9 months along with continuing no porn no masterbation.. I've been meditating for 30 mins every day. I'm active and go to the gym every day and eat healthy. Everything in my life is perfect and I have zero stress In my life, aside from the fact that I'm still impotent. After a few months I started seeing some minor improvements. Would get nocturnal erections about twice a week. Maybe throughout this 9 months I've had 1 or two morning erections. During the day my dick still feels completely dead. My sex drive is basically at a zero constantly. And my progress seems like it's not improving. I get wet dreams every three weeks or so and my dick feels even more lifeless for a couple days after I have one. My brain feels like it has 0 connection to my dick. Last week I had sex with two different girls (using Viagra). Thought maybe it would help jumpstart my progress. And now I feel even worse than before. No nocturnal.erections or anything since! Feeling like im back to square one.
If there's any reassurance or advice you could give me I'd really appreciate it. If this is PIED it's hard to believe that my case Is tthis severe. Like I said I haven't looked at any porn in about two years. I'm losing hope and am living life constantly in a state of being bummed out. This is ruining my life. Part of me can't help but feel there's something physically wrong with me that the doctors are missing but I don't know
I started watching high speed internet porn at the age of about 11. As a kid I was super hypersexual and once I got that first taste of online porn I was hooked. It didn't take long before I was jacking off multiple times a day everyday to that shit. It was a crutch for me and was a Way for me to cope with whatever problems or stress I was feeling. I remember in highschool basically running home from school everyday to jack off to porn. I was also an extremely late bloomer, so I imagine my frontal cortex was even less developed than a regular kids my age. I didn't get a ton of girls in highschool because I always looked very young for my age. Which just fueled my porn addiction even more.
Fast forward to college and I continued to beat my dick like it owed me money. Lost my virginity my first year of college to this girl after the bar. Never had any issues getting an erection, Infact, I couldn't stop getting them and was constantly horny.I was so desensitized that I couldn't even cum and I had to picture porn in order to finish. This continued for the next couple years. I'd get laid once in a while and be able to last forever and would have to imagine porn to cum, all the while continuing my extreme porn habbit and jacking off multiple times a day. But no issues whatsoever with erections.
Fast forward to my final year of college, I was 21 at the time. I took this girl home from the bar to fuck and I suddenly couldn't get an erection, AT ALL. I didn't think much of it at the time and just figured that I had too much to drink. This was the first time that had ever happened to me. In the morning I still couldn't get it up to have sex with her. When she left I tried jacking off and couldn't even give myself an erection. And that is how suddenly my erections have come and gone. I haven't been the same since.
I continued to Jack off to porn everyday with a limp dick praying things would get better, but they didn't. Finally went to a doctor a few months later and I assumed there was something physical wrong with me. Doctor said everything was fine. Blood tests came back fine and he even did an ultrasound of my vasculature which all looked normal. He said that it was likely stress and in my head. The only thing that was stressful at that time for me was school, everything else in my life was and has been prefect and stress free. Nothing that I felt could have caused this. And I feel like I would be able to get an erection at least sometimes when jacking off if stress was the culprit. So I continued to beat my lifeless dick everyday to porn wondering what the fuck was wrong with me.
Took About a year later to discover YBOP and thOught finally I had the answer to my problems. For the first year I did a shitty reboot where I Would still watch porn sometimes (cut way back) but would still masterbate (with a limp dick) to check if I could get hard. Would watch porn once in a while to check and still couldn't get hard to porn. Tried having sex several times in which I couldn't get hard at all. I never had any morning or nocturnal erections. I was fully impotent. I ended up getting some Viagra from my doctor which worked amazing. I'd take half a pill and could Smash coconuts with it.
I ended up moving away from home for work and my dick was still completely broken unless I took Viagra. Decided to seriously give nofap a try. I've basically cut out porn completely for the past 2 years. At the start I would still masterbate every few weeks or so to check my progress, and I still couldn't get it up at all, sometimes would get a half erection but nothing to write home about. I was also having sex using Viagra with different girls having one night stands couple times a month or so. So was basically doing easy mode nofap. Went to another urologist who basically confirmed what the previous doctor confirmed, that I was physically fine. I asked him if he thought porn/excessive masterbation could have been the cause and he said that it's not possible and he also said it was in my head and it was probably because entire body was stuck in a sympathetic response. But at the time everything in my life was fine and the only thing that was wrong and was giving me stress was the fact that my dick didn't work.
I ended up getting a girlfriend. We dated for about 2 years and throughout that time I was constantly taking Viagra behind her back to have sex with her, which is the worst feeling in the world. Throughout this time I didn't watch porn, maybe once or twice, and I didn't masterbate at all. But we did have sex a few times a week at least. Still was getting zero erections without Viagra. Not even morning wood or nocturnal erections. I ended up telling her everything and what I was going through. At first she was super supportive. I told her I couldn't have sex for a while because I wanted to do the hardmode reboot to try and fix myself. After a couple of months I very infrequently got nocturnal erections where I'd wake up in the middle of the night with a hard on. This was very infrequent, maybe once every other week or so. But nothing in the morning or during the day. A couple months into my reboot for my first time I was able to get an erection with my girlfriend for the first time without viagra. It took tons of foreplay and a long ass blow job to get it though. We took it really slow and I had sex with her without cumming because I didn't want to lose my progress. We continued this for a couple more months. Majority of time I would fail but sometimes could get a slow to reach erection and we'd have sex without me cumming. Throughout the day my dick still felt 100% dead and was shriveled and did not get any morning erections but got infrequent nocturnal erections. We ended up breaking up, mainly because I wanted to focus on my reboot and wanted to cut out all sexual stimulation because progress was super slow and felt like it was Delaying my reboot.
Fast forward to now. It's been 9 months that I've gone complete hard mode. No porn no masterbation no sex. Been no porn and no masterbation for close to 2 years already before this. Been no orgasm for the past 9 months along with continuing no porn no masterbation.. I've been meditating for 30 mins every day. I'm active and go to the gym every day and eat healthy. Everything in my life is perfect and I have zero stress In my life, aside from the fact that I'm still impotent. After a few months I started seeing some minor improvements. Would get nocturnal erections about twice a week. Maybe throughout this 9 months I've had 1 or two morning erections. During the day my dick still feels completely dead. My sex drive is basically at a zero constantly. And my progress seems like it's not improving. I get wet dreams every three weeks or so and my dick feels even more lifeless for a couple days after I have one. My brain feels like it has 0 connection to my dick. Last week I had sex with two different girls (using Viagra). Thought maybe it would help jumpstart my progress. And now I feel even worse than before. No nocturnal.erections or anything since! Feeling like im back to square one.
If there's any reassurance or advice you could give me I'd really appreciate it. If this is PIED it's hard to believe that my case Is tthis severe. Like I said I haven't looked at any porn in about two years. I'm losing hope and am living life constantly in a state of being bummed out. This is ruining my life. Part of me can't help but feel there's something physically wrong with me that the doctors are missing but I don't know