30 YO Lets Do This - 31 Day Headstart

Howdy folks,

I have long expected that something was wrong with me, I have been searching for 'reboot nation' and 'your brain on porn' for a very long time.

Part of me always knew that something about how often I masturbate to porn was not right (which was normally once a day after my teenage years). However so many sources out there say 'it's perfectly healthy' and my pleasure addled mind was only too happy to listen and override my fears.

This also helped me create a distinct block, a separation, of two different parts of my psyche. The animal sex monkey brain and the sensible respects woman brain. They were in fact so separated that, when I finally got a long term gf at age 24 (which I also believe is a side-effect of 'separation', the animal part of the ladies could see I wasn't attracted to them), I was completely unable to get an erection, even though I would've lost my hated virginity! A big part of that was performance anxiety though and once I got past that I was able to do the deed successfully, huzzah!

Now, here comes the brain fuck that porn brought me. I am completely unable to cum during normal sex. At first, I saw it as a blessing, I would always be able to make sure my lady was serviced first! Fantastic! However, there is a middle ground here, sometimes the ladies want you to cum, especially if you've got a good lady that cares about you. It proves that they are fulfilling you sexually and every time it doesn't happens their confidence takes a hit, and as no confidence isn't sexy it begins a downward spiral... it's a recipe for disaster.

So! I finally managed to find these websites, which confirmed some long term suspicions of mines. I started my reboot straight away. Here is my progress to date.

1st Attempt
9 days

2nd Attempt
20 days

Week long bender Yep, by this point i was absolutely dying to see porn, I actually actively missed seeing novel different naked ladies. Pretty tough times.

3rd Attempt (present attempt)
31 days and counting

Hard mode at the moment but I will be switching to normal mode when the time is right. On that note does anyone have any idea of when the time will be right? I'm still not at the morning wood stage yet. Honestly I'm not sure I'm past the flatline, I have started objectifying every woman that crosses my path, but nothing feels 'normal' yet, although I guess I've never known what normal is.

I have cravings every night when I'm alone, and being honest I think a big part of what makes long term relationships with ladies successful is finding some variety in porn. So I'm really sexually frustrated at the moment, I'm quite kinky and my lady is very vanilla so this has always been an outlet for me.

I'm keeping it together, I've actually watched porn once during the 30 days but switched it off after a minute or so because I know where the road leads. I think I can make it to ninety, although switching to normal mode might be more challenging. (In my last relapse, the chaser effect butchered me).

Finally, I want to say, this has been one of the most challenging things to do in my life. Props to everyone out there doing their best, the struggle is fucking real.

EDIT: For your reference: I started masturbating around about 12 YO, and have had internet access to porn since about 14 YO. At that time it wasn't high quality, quick turnaround, streaming sites yet so I think the effect on me might not be as bad as on someone 5 years younger. But I did still have fairly decent access to porn throughout my formative years. Anyone who thinks porn does not affect the young mind is a moron.

Still going strong at 46 days.

Might be switching over to normal mode soon.

Still going strong moving into day 63. Since day 60 I've switched to normal mode as I felt I was in a good enough place. I've been having sex but never to orgasm before day 60 and now im moving into this new territory for the last month.

I remember last time I PMO'ed I was devastated over the subsequent days by chaser effect. Thankfully I've not felt that this time round. It may be because it was an orgasm experienced not through M, which means the old neural pathways haven't reignited or whatever.

In any case I've got a lot of knowledge of my triggers now and I've built up a lot of control over myself. I'm feeling a lot of the advertised benefits too. I reckon I'm gonna make the ninety days this time.  ;D

TOPTIP: I've switched over to nice non-alcoholic beer, I will still drink when I'm out with people (in person) as this presents no risk of M (straight to bed or stay with company when home after). When on internet or alone though I'm drinking non-alcoholic. This has REALLY helped me stay in control and also has provided the side benefit of losing a couple of pounds. Good NA beers are Nanny State and Flat tyre.

Day 70 tomorrow.

Things are going well, I still have some random mood swings and sometimes very strong cravings. Some of the time I look ... but I've got enough control now not to act at the very least.

I've not experienced any chaser at all in normal mode compared to the insane chaser i experienced after PMO during my first couple of attempts.

I've already experienced a lot of results, my wife is much happier and I've been able to climax through vanilla sex. The last time I did that was going on five years ago, so there are definite results overall and the whole experience thus far has had an exceptionally positive effect on my life.

Hopefully see y'all at day 80. The finish line is in sight!

Hello all,

Just to let you know that I've reached day 90. I've graduated!

Its been a difficult road for sure, but I'm so much happier with my life and I'm now at the point when I feel that PMO is not worth it, considering the benefits I receive.

Thinking about the future and what comes next, I've decided I'm going to let myself masturbate again but a maximum of once per month if I'm feeling a bit pent up. Otherwise I will be using what I've learned over the course of this journey and abstaining.

Here's my list of things that really helped me out which you might wanna try.

- Learn from your mistakes,  if you succumb and end up PMOing use it for next time. Figure out the things that 'set you off' and limit your exposure to them as best you can.
- For me a big one of these was alcohol, I'm more commonly drinking non-alcoholic beer when I'm alone to try and limit that trigger.
- Another was (a bit more obvious) naked ladies on the internet, we used a child filter called Quistido to limit what i could access online. Its a tad humiliating, but its very very effective. I know what I'm doing when it comes to computers, but having to make that extra step to consciously get rid of the software helped tremendously in providing a deterrent.
- I personally switched to normal mode at day 60ish, this was also really helpful for me as it should be the *upside* of going through all this and what I was doing it for. Starting off in hard mode was really valuable though. I would do that first if you are reading this at the beginning of your journey.
- I had a reward prepared if I managed to make it to 90 days, a bit of technology I want... but being honest this provided very little motivation for me, and I love buying stuff and getting new things! If you want to motivate yourself I would suggest looking for a deeper reason than just getting a nice thing or punishing yourself i.e. think less 'carrot and stick' more 'golden spiritual/lifechanging carrot'.
- Another cool thing I learned was a bit of thought control! I found that when I was thinking powerful sexual thoughts I could get rid of them by taking some long deep breaths, which relaxed my body a bit and takes the focus off sex. A handy wee tip!

Ok I think that's everything. I probably won't be posting again, I think I've done what I've needed to do and don't have anything more to share either.

Keep fighting ladies and gents. I believe in you.