Disposable women

Who are the flesh and blood women whom we call upon to satisfy our lust? We use them like the tissues we discard after M, and with a click of the mouse they are gone. I've found it easier to resist the lure of P when I think of these women whom society has deemed disposable. Well, I think, the videos are already made and are free, so why not PMO? Even though we may not pay for P, we are still engaged in sustaining the market for it. We are still participating in the degradation and objectification of women, even those whom we trick ourselves into believing want to be in P.

So, we harm ourselves, our partners, and the women in P. Aren't those three good reasons to resist P?

I write this not as one holier than thou preaching down to others, but as one who faces the same struggles and temptations as anyone else striving to reboot my brain. I make the same excuses, tell myself the same lies, and feel the same shame when I relapse.

"We are what we think/all that we are arises with out thoughts/with our thoughts we make the world." - Buddha

Well said Buddha,  you are a great asset to this forum!

Its actually damaging to men as well, and not just those addicted but in general. There is a documentary called missrepresentation which you might find interesting. Os to do with how women are portrayed in media and the damage ot does to men and women. (Maybe some triggering images in)

Although I agree with the most what buddha said, there do still exist bitchy "girls" who deserve to be treated like objects. Because they treat others the same and they don't care about your feelings...

Zenreboot said:

there do still exist bitchy "girls" who deserve to be treated like objects

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What exactly is a "bitchy girl"? And what do you mean by "treated like objects"?

Zenreboot- You will never convince me of such a concept. No matter how a person acts they deserve to be treated with respect. It goes beyond any concept of religion or sin, neither of which I happen to ascribe to. But it is unethical to treat a person as an object to be used and discarded. How we treat others is a reflection on US, not the other person.

https://vimeo.com/72015293

Misrepresentation, as mentioned by cuppatea in her post.

Zenreboot said:

and they don't care about your feelings...

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Don't they? I think that the most fiercely assertive people tend to also have the thickest skin. I.e., I think they don't mind saying what they really think because they aren't offended by others saying the same sort of stuff to them, so they don't realise you will be. If they study psychology, say, and find out that others are more easily offended, I suspect that most would become more empathic and would be less critical of those they consider to be sensitive. Therefore I think they don't expect you to be offended by the things they say.

They also aren't afraid of you being offended, I think. If they see you are offended, they may well just think you're being overly sensitive and that they have done nothing wrong, because they don't consider what they said to be that bad. I doubt that many of them are actually horrible people (i.e. that they are trying to be mean), they just have a different perspective to you. If you agree that they aren't trying to be mean, then in what sense are they bitchy?

An exception would be if you really piss off such a person. Then, they may well not mind hurting your feelings.

@ Zenreboot im curious to hear your answers to blue 's questions and can you maybe give examples for your last statement.

Well... If it was so hard to understand. Under the term bitchy "girl" I mean selfish notoriously spoiled materialistic "girls" who will break your heart, use you, betray you if they see more materialistic benefits with others. And now dont pretend like you have never encountered or heared about people like these. And under the term they deserve to be treated like object I mean that these kind of people are empty inside like objects and you shouldn't let them hurt your feelings like an object itself won't hurt you on its own. You shouldn't fall in love with them cause they will hurt you and use you in order to satisfy their needs! And yes unfortunatelly there do exist some "people" who feed on others suffering!

To simplify it further, you've been burned in love and are now bitter.

No, I don't pretend I've never met a "spoiled materialistic" woman, but I don't treat them like trash, either. As I wrote before, how we treat others reflects on us, not them.

No I didn't but my very close friend did. And he suffered much... And I know what I am talking about. I also recommend you to read my answer once again with more attention. I didn't mention trash at all. Good luck!

I think maybe there is a misunderstanding in communication here. Zenreboot, when you say treat like an object do you mean that you don't give anything of yourself emotionally, the same as with objects. Because I think where people are confused is that they are taking treat like an object to mean use them. In that context saying bitchy girls deserve to be treated like objects, kind of sounds like it would be ok for you to objectify and use women who are bitchy, which seems like a really harsh and immoral thing to do.  From your other post though it seems more like you just mean that there are some selfish women who it is better to not be involved with emotionally because you are likely to get burnt.

Thanks, cuppatea- I think (hope) your interpretation is what he meant, because in my original post I stated clearly used as objects in the sense of abusing women rather than leaving them be as if they were harmful objects.

I guess I am thinking the male version would be di%*head?  We have all encountered these in our years.  But never did I treat one like an object.  And I am thinking looking at the description of the cold unemotional person part, we Partners may have one that we are living with and yet we hang in there. 

Not causing trouble, but saying there are both males and females that fit the description.  And by using our little euphemisms, we are already making them objects.  Notice I said we.  Guilty myself.

yes let me also start by acknowledging my guilt aswell.. i have done it countless times and i'm still struggling with it.. i think cup has done a good job interpreting our corncern. @ zen do you feel that she also represented you well?

P.S depending on ur answer this might also affect the recovery process.

I think my meaning was clear in the original post titled "Disposable Women." I referred to " we use them like the tissues we discard after M" and "We are still participating in the degradation and objectification of women."

To say that "there do still exist bitchy "girls" who deserve to be treated like objects" suggests a contradiction of the concept I posited, especially when it follows "Although I agree with the most what buddha said..."

I generally don't get involved in back and forth who said what, but my original post and the response seems obvious to me, even if it was walked back with an alternate explanation.

Buddha it seems like you are willing to start an argument. It is funny if you think I would walk back my opinion based on your views lol. And yes I clearly explained what I mean twice and if you still don't understand I am not going to babysit. It is your business how you interpret sentences I am not trying to prove you anything.

Not looking for an argument. I posted what I posted and you posted what you posted. It's over.