Fantasy use, is it a hindrance?

Ok guys 46 year old man her who has pied and is rebooting.  I have been clean and sober for one month now.  What started me here is simple.  I can perform for porn but much much more difficult with a love person.  I'm getting divorced and I pick up a new girlfriend who is hot getting divorced as well.  We met in a 12 step recover program.  This is a match made I. Heaven, we are both reviving sex addicts,  who share the same fantasies.  Wow is right!!  Anyway I have had all these issues, desensized penis, difficulty maintaining etc.  well she is also a psychologist who teaches at a college.
Anyway she knows all about this website and has decided to embark on this journey with me.  Well we have started via text at night yo indulge in fantasy play via text.  I have not been masturbayion go but have been getting very arroused.  Is this type of play screwing up my reboot?  Today when I was fooling around with her I had only a 3/4 and of course all the mental stuff kicks in and here I am in this forum asking the question.  Thoughts?
Play

Stop the texting and go on a date with her. Have real contact with her. Being a psychologist and an addict herself, surely she will understand your PIED and be patient with you and supportive of you.

I've read on a post over on "yourbrainrebalanced" , and they were talking about how fantasies are just as dangerous as MO. Reason being is the whole abstaining from porn is to get rid of these synapses that create the desire for sexual acts/P/O. What fantasies are, and talking about them still stimulate those neurons, result in a "mental relapse," and hinder improvement. Hope you stay strong on this one. She sounds like an awesome lady.