Time to bash out the demon on the road to a porn free life

Hello, i am a 22 year old porn recovering addict from the Netherlands. I will write a short story so you get to know my situation and can asses wether you have a simular problem. If so, i would like to beat porn with you, as with a friend who holds you accountable beating an addiction can be much easier. Well then..

I have been watching porn since my 15th birthday or so. I watched normal soft porn the very first years. When i became 18th my porn habits began to change, i came accros weird categories on the homepage and clicked on it only to find it very repulsive. I can remember clicking a cuckold video and find find it very repulsive and clicked it away after a few seconds. Anyway my taste slowly began to change and i would watch anal porn, animal porn, and eventually i began to watch sissy porn, cuckold porn. I was completely unaware of the consequences of porn and i would continue to watch these kinds of porn eventhough i feeled massive shame and guilt because of it.

A couple of months later i met my former gf which i had a relation with for 3 years. I never had sex before and was kind of nervous, the first time i wanted to have sex with her so bad but my dick was sort of limp. I went to my doctor and he was willing to give me viagra (to take the pressure of). The next time me and my former gf tried to have sex, it was all on and i could fuck her without a problem, even went for a second time within the hour. At that time i was amazed how good normal sex was versus porn so i stopped watching porn for months. But after that period, sex with my gf didn't arouse me the way it did at first, so i began watching porn again reguraly. I watched porn 5 times a week at that time and simultanously had sex with my gf. My desire to have real sex detoriated and i even desired watching porn more then have sex with my gf.

I was disgusted with myself but i couldn't battle my porn addiction, eventually my gf and i seperated ways (this was around 1 year ago). Since then i quit watching porn only to find myself relapsing. Everytime i wanted sex with a girl, 4 times since the breakup i didn't feel a real desire for sex with the girls, my dick would go limp. I think my porn watching is declined by 80% or so because now i wank for like 2 times pro month instead of 5 times a week. But still i want to quit watching it all together because porn to me induces feelings like fear, shame, feeling unworthy because i can't get my dick up with a real woman.

My goal is to eradicate porn from my life and have caring good sex again without worrying my dick will go hard and with the desire for real sex! In a month or so i will be going overseas to study and i would have the option to meet girls there and maybe have sex with. I don't want to go abroad with pmo addiction! Note that in the last half year i watched porn like 4 times pro month, so i progressed alot, but i want to fully stop with this.

I would like to team up with someone to beat the addiction and hold together accountable, feel free to contact me!

greetings

 
L

Lero

Guest
What's up, man? Welcome to the forum. I'm always available when it comes to beating this addiction with other people.
 

pichaelthompson

Active Member
Welcome! I have also had problems in the past with PIED and fetish porn. I can say with confidence the fetish urges do die down even when the desire for sex is still there. That being said, any relapse will bring it back to what it once was. I suggest starting out on hard mode (no P, M, or O) and then transitioning to O when you feel like normal sex will be very arousing without viagra. Best of luck to you!
 
Day 3

Haven't posted in the past 2 days but didn't pmo.
I really didn't have the urge to pmo at all! Mainly because i have been busy i think, going out with friends and seeing the family. Will be going abroad in about 1 month, i hope my addiction is gone when i am abroad. Had a small talk about pmo with my brothers, they told me they suffered from it aswell and really disliked porn.

greetings brothers  8)
 
Hey friend
        Sooo happy to see your progress. Proud of you. You told me to think only about the present and live it. You are right. Also, keeping ourselves busy and hanging out with family and friends helps me a lot too just like it helped you. Keep it up and go as you are going. These 3 days will become a month in no time and you will see yourself recovering. LET'S FIGHT FOR LOVE. ALL THE BEST. I'M WITH YOU!
 
Day 4
Yesterday had a great day! i mo'ed, no not by myself but with a girl! I met her at the club and we went home. Had a great time together, my dick was rock hard man, she jerked me off and i came. So glad i didn't suffer from ed or something. I think my declined porn use payed off after all! I will keep on fighting porn, real life intimiacy is so much better!

have a good day!

 
penguin_36 said:
Hey friend
        Sooo happy to see your progress. Proud of you. You told me to think only about the present and live it. You are right. Also, keeping ourselves busy and hanging out with family and friends helps me a lot too just like it helped you. Keep it up and go as you are going. These 3 days will become a month in no time and you will see yourself recovering. LET'S FIGHT FOR LOVE. ALL THE BEST. I'M WITH YOU!
Thanks man, really grateful for your support! Let's do this! If you need advice or something you can always ask me.
 
day 6

Sorry bros skipped day 5. But luckely nothing bad happened that day. I am glad to announce that i am feeling good guys. I can really feel the difference between a life wo porn and with porn. It won't be long before i can enjoy a well earned vacation. Also, i am reclaiming my brain even further with deleting all social media apps from my phone. I will check facebook ocassionally but i believe that too much social media is causing depression.

peace out
 
Amazing! You're on the right track. The high at the beginning is great. Really let it soak in and remember how everything feels possible right now. At some point the high will crash, and that's when the hard work begins, and you're gonna want to remember this feeling, because it can come back but it will take work!
 

No regrets

Member
Mrblueberry, You amaze me with how well you are able to cope with the stress one gets from exams. You are amazing  ;D ;D
 
Thank you for all that you do for me said:
Mrblueberry, You amaze me with how well you are able to cope with the stress one gets from exams. You are amazing  ;D ;D

Thanks man, appreciate it a lot!!
 
day 9-10

I had a busy and mostly fun weekend. I went to the bar saturday with old friends, i couldn't keep a convo going with a girl, i wasn't feeling it. When something like that happens i feel inadequate immediately and think that other guys are better then me. I got to work on that feeling, it keeps me down big time. Today went swimming to a friends place, tired as fuck, really disliked to be social today (with things from yesterday in the back of my head) . With things like this it is really hard to keep away from porn. My mind tells me that porn can quiet me down and make things all good for me... But i won't listen to it! It's telling me lies to watch porn again because it's easy for my mind.

so conclusion, it has been though

greetings bros
 

No regrets

Member
Keep doing what you?re doing.  Go big or go home, am I right? You always choose the first option. You are a  strong person I know, and there is nothing that can stop you from winning. I admire you with every little piece of my soul. When you are about to give up ? hang on a bit longer. You never know what wonderful things await you just around the corner! You are worth so much more !
 
day 11

getting more free time now i have vacation, i think abstaining from pmo will get more difficult by the day. Loneliness and feeling down can trigger me to pmo big time. Got to keep away from this!

stay strong bros
 

Do or die

Respected Member
Make an urge table.
The reboot is not a 90 days battle. This battle is of whole life. So be prepare .
You can do it 100% if you prepared before they appeared.
 

No regrets

Member
Every single motherfucking bad day, you've EVER had, you've overcome it. Everytime you thought you couldn't go on, you did.
WOW.
WOOOOOOW. Fucking proud of you  :)
 
Thank you for all that you do for me said:
Every single motherfucking bad day, you've EVER had, you've overcome it. Everytime you thought you couldn't go on, you did.
WOW.
WOOOOOOW. Fucking proud of you  :)

Thanks bro!!! Feeling better about myself everyday, just accept who you are and don't compare yourself to others, we all are unique persons.
 
day 12

the urge is getting stronger, but i know it's just my mind screaming to be indulged by a fast dopamine breakfast. Nonetheless, i need to keep busy to avoid a pmo. My plan is to work out , eat healthy and to keep in touch with friends. Also watch netflix and game to fill up spare time. Oh and the support from you guys is literally amazing, i am so grateful for you guys in this forum! Without you i think i would have relapsed.

greetings and keep up the good work!

 
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