New here, and I need help!

I have been addicted to MBing for almost all of my life.  I am 30 years old and I started around the age of 5.  I am addicted to pornography and fantasy.  My addiction has ruined my life up to this point.  It has caused major mental health problems such as anxiety, paranoia, depression, and obsessive and intrusive thoughts.  I use MBing and fantasy in many different areas of my life.  I use it not only when I am horney, but when I am mad, upset, happy, bored, and so on.  However it is just a vicious cycle for me, MB, feel all these shameful feelings and do it again to stop the feelings.  Everytime I do it, it gets worse.  When I get some time under my belt I find another reason to relapse.  I really need help and am willing to take any suggestions.  I want to start a journal on here tomorrow and get started with recovery right away.  There has to be a better life on the other side of this.

Thanks.

Welcome brother!  You have taken a big step already in that you realize you have a problem.

If you haven't already, please check out the "Road to Recovery" section on this site's home page, and watch the videos.  Understanding the science behind why this is an addiction and how it works is the best first step you can take to breaking the cycle because then you'll know what you're up against, and how to beat it, or rather, how to stop beating it  :  Starting a journal is a great idea. 

Thank u for responding to me first off.  Rite now i am in a drug rehab for another problem that i have.  But my sexual problems has always been my first addiction.  Drugs were a way i used to cope against my mental health symptoms caused by my mbing and pornography.  Anyways the computers here dont have speakers so watching those videos wont help me much without any sound.  But anything else i can use and participate in on the site i am more than willing to.  Thanks again for your response and greeting.  It means a lot to me.

You can get help.  Go to You Tube and search Sean Stewart.  He has a lot of videos that may help you.  He has helped me within just three weeks.

Good luck and do the hard work it takes to stop addiction.

I am looking for an accountability partner.  Maybe we would be a good fit.

[email protected]

Hey! tom46017 here.  You had suggested we might be accountability partners.  That may work.  Your situation is quite different than mine.

Try going to You Tube and searching Sean Stewart.  He has a lot of videos on there that have helped me. 

Did you say your computers have not sound.  That has to be a problem when trying to watch help sessions such as Sean Stewart.

You can always e-mai me at [email protected]

ya, no sound and the counter thing won't work for me.  i am going to go to the library tomorrow and see if it is different on their computer.